in chase of the ring…5 things that probably won’t get you engaged…

in a week or so the nba playoffs will be in full swing with 15 teams looking to obtain that ever elusive nba championship ring from mr. bryant and company…there’s just one small issue…those staple center dwellers (and clippers, you know we aren’t talking about you) aren’t looking to part with it easily…with that in mind, several teams spent the last several months making moves to improve their chances of landing that golden knuckle cozy…the folks down in south beach went out and grabbed dan gilbert’s best friend, the knicks picked up lala’s husband while okc acquired the man with no smile muscles…

on the non-millionaire athlete side of town, there are others amongst us who are in search of an elusive ring as well…although no one is sure how the moves described above might work out, i’m quite sure that the tactics some of you are resorting to to achieve “championship status” will only leave you back in the lottery next season…

when those guys become ‘That Guy’…

New York- ‘concrete jungle where dreams are made of’ blah blah blah. The city that never sleeps is soon turning into the city where nobody ever settles down. As of 2008, the national median age for women to get married was 26. For men it was 28. This was the oldest recorded since the census started keeping track in the 1890s. I imagine in New York City, one must add at least 10 5 years to those numbers in order for them to start sounding believable. Being old a mature single is widely accepted and embraced in cities such as New York, and if we use onetrik’s proclivity for not settling down as a litmus test, Los Angeles as well.

However, the idea that you do not see marriage in your near future does not mean it’s acceptable to be ‘That Guy’. Who is “That Guy”, you wonder? I’ll explain. ‘That Guy’ is that old-ish dude at the club that younger women mistake for somebody’s lecherous uncle.  Remember when you were in your early twenties and you saw someone with slightly outdated clothing at a table buying bottles, inviting pretty young thangs over to share his wealth and thinking he was ‘Doing it’, when really everyone else thought he was just old? This blog is dedicated to ‘That Guy’ and UBF’s dedication to making sure ‘He’ isn’t YOU.