the whiskey effect…

As has become a weekly tradition, I spent my Monday telling myself that I would never again spend the weekend consuming mind altering amounts of liquor. As a contributor to a blog with alcoholic containers in the title, you may ask why would I even consider depriving myself of the good times juice. While the hangover is less than desirable when trying to look competent at the day gig, they aren’t the primary culprit of my weekly regret. The real reason for conjuring up needed life changes (that are coincidently forgotten by the time Wednesday happy hour rolls around) is the associated drunk logic that overrides my usual good home training…

Now this inebriated thought process is different based on the individual but the consistent theme is that you’ll normally wake up owing yourself, friends, significant other, bondsmen, judge and/or baby jesus a heartfelt ‘my bad’. For the more responsible of you not familiar with these perils of questionable decision making, I have decided to share some of my better moments as they were told to me through sober friends, text messages and pictures in an attempt to help you learn from my mistakes…

actions speak louder than words…on this particular night my extensive vocabulary was on the fritz so I was forced to rely on simpler body language. In attempting to garner the attention of a fellow club goer, I substituted hand grabbage for spittage which in itself isn’t so horrible…that is until I was made aware that her other hand happened to be occupied by her apparent boyfriend who didn’t quite appreciate what we held in common at that moment. Luckily my homies’ diplomatic skills ensured that no further physical actions took place…namely between his free hand and my moneymaker…

too good of a deal to pass up…nothing tops off a good night of two steppin and bourbon like fried chicken. Not sure the science behind it but chicken is always a good idea post 3am…what isn’t a good idea is ordering the 8 piece chicken platter (not meal) for one after 3am. While it is financially a better deal per wing/breast, your stomach will not agree with your savvy shopping the next morning…

drunk at first sight…being on either side of a drunk texting conversation can prove to be great middle of the night entertainment. It does create a bit of a problem when you are engaging in this conversation prior to an actual face to face conversation. Following being introduced to a friend of a friend, my friend Jack Daniels convinced me that reaching out to the newest entry to my phonebook would make for a good first impression. She apparently without Mr. Daniels whispering in her ear did not agree…

honorable mention…participating in a butterfly contest with no music… attempting to hurdle velvet rope and in the process knocking down 12 connected chains of the rope outside of the club…walking 30+ blocks on south beach to meet up with what was thought to be a swan but in actuality was a duck…

As I go get a companion for this empty glass and ice, do any of the ubf fam feel like sharing their own stories of less judgment and more embarrassment?

onetrik…it was all good just a drink ago…

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About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

One Response to the whiskey effect…

  1. Pingback: the bottle benefits… « Us, Bottles, and Friends

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