the difference between best friends and “best friends”…

a while ago, that dude onetrik talked you through the difference between homies and homiettes…and now that you’ve had a few months to chew on that, i’d like to add a little salt and vinegar…but i’ll start by telling a very short mildly informative story…

my college ex and i broke up when i graduated and ran off to hunch strangers find my plot in life…later…following a few attempts to squirt lighter fluid and throw matches at that expired flame, we decided that we’d probably be better off as friends…but a funny thing happened on the way to friend land…we somehow found ourselves wading through this murky pool of grey…

for those unfamiliar…the grey area is the mythical place where nothing is defined so almost anything goes…a diet relationship if you will…you still have a person to share all of your latest life developments and inside jokes with…however, you have your own lives and live them relatively unobstructed…but you also know that anytime your two privates are in the same area code, they might meet up for coffee, drinks or that meal between dinner and breakfast…

“grey area” really seemed to undermine all of the fun we found in this new phase so we opted for the lighter more widely accepted moniker of posturepedic partners “best friends”…this new title never fully encapsulated nor clearly defined what we really had become, which was  a barrier to any new relationships…we maintained this “best friendom” until one of us, namely the one not standing/sitting before you today, was smart enough to figure out we were stunting each other’s emotional growth…

i hear you out there…”elrock, you’re right…that story was only mildly informative…furthermore, it has absolutely nothing to do with me and my opposite sex bff”…apply a little pressure to those brakes homie…former boos aren’t the only ones that can get caught up in a case of faux bff syndrome…below are a couple more ways to test if you and your bestie are breast stroking through this off-black area…

i love lists…sorry…just had to get that off my chest…

– if you ever gaze upon said best friend like chubby kids gaze upon the grown up meals at burger king…the ones they really want but can’t have…your friendship is indeed, impure…

– you compare all new boo-pplicants to the best friend…although you denied it before, this is a pretty good sign that i was talking about you in the point above…

– you consistently find something wrong with any new prospect they bring around when the only real problem is they’re not you…

– your bestie sometimes doubles as your opponent in naked sumo…if you know your best friend’s “no-no” is always within figurative arm’s reach…then yeah…this is where you get off the bff express…

– if you and the bestie have ever engaged in anything that you avoid telling the current boo…ahh, you thought you would be off the hook if you could only speak about those occurrences in the past tense…consider this your written wrist smacking…

– if you’re afraid to tell the bestie about your new boos because you’re sure it will threaten your “if we’re not married my xx age” fallback plan hurt their feelings …

– deep down…in that part of your heart where honesty lays its head…you know you’d rather be more than best friends…i know i kinda said this one before, but i though it bared repeating…

of course there’s nothing really wrong with being involved in any of the situations described above…i just wanted to highlight that 5 foot something hurdle that may be standing between you and any new meaningful relationship…

so…after you forward this to your bestie, can you please come back and tell us how yours is different… i might even be totally off base with this…that’s ok…i’ll wait…(insert whistle)…

elrock…that’s what friends are for…kinda…

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About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

2 Responses to the difference between best friends and “best friends”…

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention the difference between best friends and “best friends”… « Us, Bottles, and Friends -- Topsy.com

  2. RandomGirl says:

    Agreed. If you used to fuck consistently, but you don’t anymore, however you talk on the phone regularly whenever you don’t have a man/woman, you have a high potential to want to fuck them in the future given the right circumstances and ARE a threat to potential relationships. You’re going to have to put that in check before you get fiance’d.

    Most people have participated in some type of emotional crutch work with some of their friends of the opposite sex. I have an awesome crutch right now, sure, it’s stunting my relationship growth for the time being, however I don’t have time for all that relationship nonsense right now anyhow.

    I do know tho that at some point if/when my crutch becomes “just friends” and I end up in a serious relationship I’ll have to be honest that… yeah, we had a deep connection and something could have happened, but didn’t. These situations will test serious relationships, if the relationship can survive a bfffb then you might have a good thing on your hands.

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