top post 2010 #2…play your position…

*****We find ourselves at the #2 spot today with our first ever guest post from mboogie. Evidently everyone liked it. The question now is will she be back in 2011.*****

Today I want to break away from the insight that elrock and onetrik share and offer some dating advice from a woman’s perspective. An unfortunate situation a few weeks ago in the City of Angels got me thinking that I might need to start handing out red in-violation cards to those men who break the rules of the holleration game. While I understand that some rules are up for debate, I think there is a holy grail of dos/donts of hollering, and ‘never hover’ is definitely on that list.

So there I was, partying in the tradition of Big Meech or Larry Hoover © Rick Rawse with a drink in hand and a nice looking guy approaches me. I quickly give him a once-over: dude checks in around 5’11, decent build, nice kicks, friendly smile. I figure homie is worth chatting with…  I couldn’t have been more wrong. We chat Jamaica (10 bonus points), LA, job, travel (5 bonus points) for about 7 minutes. He asks and I provide my cell phone number so we can continue the conversation. At that point…any reasonable man would smile, say something sweet or funny, and depart and leave me with my friends…leaving me to wonder about what he said and excited about a possible follow-up meeting.

This guy missed that memo. And this would be the reason for his quick downfall. In the next 30 minutes he would lose any points that he accrued and I would immediately regret the decision to give him my cell number. Why? Because dude did NOT move…he stayed and HOVERED. Saying everything and nothing at all.

I don’t have the heart to be rude to men who approach me respectfully…so when he didn’t get the hint after a few awkward glances at the floor…I politely excused myself to the restroom…hoping that would be the last time I saw him. This would not be my lucky night. He hung slightly back from where my friends were dancing and appeared like a ninja in the night when I came back. Evidently, he felt the need to BLOCK any other possible suitors from coming to talk to me by standing there and playing the position of my man. *blank stare*

I wanted to whisper in his ear that blocking (I really felt hemmed up) in the party is not gonna be the way you win with me but I refuse to coach a grown man about rules he should have learned a decade ago.

If said situation happens…us women tend to think a number of things:

–          Your game is NOT tight

–          You are lacking in the confidence arena

–          You are thirsty

–          There is clear stalker-potential

–          There is probably definitely something wrong with you

There is a time for persistence…the initial meeting is NOT that time…but I digress…

In the next few days, he quickly racked up enough offenses of the holleration game to get him kicked out the league. I don’t have the space to go into everything nor my reactions (just know: I doubled locked my doors in case he tracked me down) …the following is a list of ways he tried to contact me after his initial hovering debacle… please keep in mind that I did not respond in any way:

–          Day 1: text

–          Day 2: Phone call, text, another text

–          Day 3: Text that he wants to take me to dinner that nite or the next

–          Day 4: Phone call, voicemail, follow-up text that he left me a voicemail

–          Day 6: Text

–          Day 6-onward: silence…finally!

I’m not lying. True story. He was doing the mostest.

So the moral of this story (if there has to be one) is for men to approach women on the strength of you—if you are the bizness—then she will pick up that phone call and none of the other men who tried to talk to her after you did that night will matter. If you hover, she more than likely will play you to the left.

Despite this unfortunate incident, I’m still in these mean streets of LA, Chicago, NY…happy to meet starters who know how to play their position. All the others who haven’t learned game rules can stay on the bench.

Ladies: How do you deal with a man who tries to hover for the night?

Men: What do you do when another guy is blocking the lady you are interested in the whole night?



About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

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