and the winner is…

for those keeping count at home, the score is now women 2 – men 1…or something like that…but ladies, before you all go off to have your celebratory gold digging exploration sponsored eyebrow threading…i have some bad news for you…onetrik was right…

but fellows, before you head off to make it rain gold bullion on the head of wine and dine lady #48, i must inform you that lolita was swimming in the pond of truth as well…that look of bewilderment leads me to believe that you

a) are currently enjoying a plate of boston market and wondering how the juice you just licked from your fingers could taste just as good if not better than the chicken itself or…

b) don’t understand how the battle of the sexes could possibly have 2 winners…

the answer is simple…you are all winning…until…well…you start losing…i’ll wait for a second to let the gravity of that thought sink in…yeah…it actually is that simple…as long as you are currently getting the benefits you want out of your dating life, you can wear all the blue ribbons and championship belts you want…but the moment your focus changes…or you start realizing that what used to make you happy is now boring you to tears, you have to start handing those belts over to me because i’ll never change those still locked into the proverbial game..

fellows…and by fellows, i am speaking to the ones that have moved out of mom’s basement, aren’t currently inmates at such and such correctional facility and the ones that really enjoy the company of women and not just because it’s been deemed more socially acceptable…there is indeed no shortage of women to kick out before daybreak date…some of these will also support that pesky sexy time habit…but one day you’ll wake up with a burning sensation when you go #1 next to lady #54 and wonder whatever happened to lady #3 or #12…you know the ones that actually liked you before you bought them cheddar bay biscuits and tennis bracelets…

ladies…and by ladies i mean the ones that still have some form of indirection in their pay for play dating activities…there is no shortage of dudes willing to turn their piggy banks upside down or at least tilt them to the point where the nookie comes out…but you too will one day wake up with an unplanned baby and feet too fat to fit into those fancy red bottom shoes understanding that there is no meal outside of mr chow on earth that can make up for the time you lost sitting across the table from someone suffering from personality displacement disorder, some dude with a felony conviction in his immediate past/future or some old man that is old enough to remember the original temptations’ parents

i recently had the pleasure of hearing renowned author and motivational speaker lisa nichols do her “breakthrough” talk thing…i tend to glaze over when there’s too much excitement, but i do remember her saying “if you want something different, you have to be something different”…so when folks are ready to give up the gold pandering and plutie plundering, i just hope there’s a “loving boo” uniform left in your size…

elrock…i win…

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About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

4 Responses to and the winner is…

  1. Lolita says:

    If I didn’t know better, I would think elrock was calling both onetrik and me losers. But I do know better. So I’ll just pretend we didn’t read this…

  2. Marcie says:

    Hilarious!!! And, since I consider myself fair-minded & have appointed myself the official unofficial referee, I give a point to Onetrik, lmao!!!

    Seriously, I said a long time ago I was retired…and, it’s precisely for these reasons…

    Knowing the game does not mean living the game….

    Now…back to work…please, keep the par-tay going :)

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