it was over when…

my apologies if i seem a little amped today…this weekend my beloved arkansas razorbacks (don’t judge me…i was born into it) scored their first road victory in 2 years…as customary when my team wins, i scoured the internet for varying descriptions of how they were able to pull off the victory…when they lose, i prepare 2 shots of jack…i pour one down my throat and pour the other one on my modem…

the first stop on this internet tour is usually espn.com…they always provide a snapshot of every major game that occurred that weekend…calling out the top performers, quoting some obscure stat from the game and providing their “it was over when” moment…they use that last section to highlight the play that essentially put the game out of reach for the losers…of course it’s a lot easier to point out these plays in hindsight, but i often wonder (and by often i mean this is the very first time i ever thought about it) if the players knew at that point that the game was indeed over, would they really keep playing…

unfortunately relationships also seem to have those points where one or both parties should know it’s over but more often than not, they just keep on playing…all the while risking further head and heart injury…with that in mind, i decided to channel my extra energy into the creation of this “it was over when” relationship list…

it was over when:

– you found that empty condom wrapper…and yall don’t use them that brand…if it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck…then…well at least you know that duck is not pregnant…

– the mate started using your darkest secrets against you…when things evolve from mild love spats to full blown ufc style emotional street brawls, it’s pretty difficult to recover…

– b.b. king and lucille walked in and sat on the edge of your bed and began to sing “the thrill is gone” right in the middle of sexy time…that is unless sad songs make you randy…

– there were 3 alibis that just didn’t check out… ”you know you done effed up, don’t you? you know it, don’t you? you know you done effed up.” you can continue this bill duke style interrogation or just skip town sans the std…your choice…

– you realized that the only thing you two had in common was your need for oxygen…and how much happier you would be if that oxygen was being supplied from different places…

– his hand got a foursquare check in on your face…don’t hang around long enough to let it become the mayor…

that’s just my short list…i’m sure folks have some other offences that should lead both parties to the middle of the field to shake hands and part ways…

elrock…the call on the field stands…

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About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

2 Responses to it was over when…

  1. Tina says:

    (Trying to get the image of them singing “The Thrill is Gone” on the edge of the bed…”) Giggle.
    Three more… Okok four.
    Doing anything mean-spirited;
    Signaling you’re tuning me out consistently;
    Putting your relationship with others before ours in priority;
    Sharp decline in sheet-dancing.

  2. Delaney says:

    Yea…for me it was over and irrevocable when I decided to throw down the gauntlet and have the ‘this isn’t working for me’ conversation..and he not only tried to convince me that I should settle for him as a Mr. Right Now and when I declined, he promptly deleted me from his FB, BBM and probably his life as I know it..I chalked his behavior up as a #grownmanfail and #bulletdodged..

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