read it or else…

the dating world is a puzzling place where a lot of really dumb things can transpire…but in the land of possible stupidity, the dating ultimatum reigns supreme…i use dating ultimatum loosely as it also includes marriage promises and nookie withholdings as well…

i get it…you’re tired of some ongoing behavior/non-behavior…changes are required etc etc…but i am afraid you have chosen the wrong path to affect positive change…wait…before you waste breath or brain trying to put forth a counter point, let me assure you that whatever you are about to say is going to be about as useful as a coupon at a crack house (you see…crack houses generally don’t accept coupons…don’t ask me how i know)…

think about it…if a person really loved you the way they would need to in order to put up with some of the really silly ish you do, would you really have to verbally twist their arm to get them to stick around…you may get the desired outcome, but i’d bet there’s gonna be a few things missing…namely real love and possibly fidelity…and i’d consider those to be fairly important…

relationships are big deals…or at least they should be once you’re over 25.5 years old…and marriage is like the ron burgundy of relationships…do you really want to rely on a promise made by a guy overridden by pent up sexual frustration because you’ve decided to knot our knees until he put a ring on it…granted, he would also be dumb for making such a foolish purchase under more foolish circumstances, but he’s a guy and we’re predisposed to making some of life’s biggest decisions with the smallest most ill equipped head… but that doesn’t mean you have to egg it on…if you’re not getting your needs met, you should seriously consider moving on…but leave that ultimatum behind…along with that ultimatum induced marriage proposal…

elrock…and i approve this message…


About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

One Response to read it or else…

  1. morningjoi says:

    the ultimatum-induced marriage proposal…. worst grand gesture in the world.

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