arm candy…

I’m not referring to the iced out jewelry that the your favorite rapper rents for video shoots and award shows. Instead, the more human version that comes with a heart beat, appetite and million dollar smile.

You probably just got a mental picture that looks something like this (If not then just enjoy the photo like me):

While Ms. Rose definitely meets the definition, I’m actually flipping the tables today and talking about being male arm candy. With that said, while this is intended for the gentleman feel free to keep reading ladies as you do play a key role in this arrangement as well.

Before we get started, let me set the table for this food for thought.

Most men grow up with lofty goals of one day being successful. Agreed?

While that success can mean completely different things for each of us (winning in court vs. winning on the court), the common denominator for all Clydes tends to be having that Bonnie to share that success with eventually. True?

So all of us (hopefully) leave our father and mother on a journey to find that success and our ride or die Bonnie. Still with me?

Bonnie should possess any number of attributes based on our preferences (mine vs. elrock’s). But regardless of where our success ladder takes us, we are usually interested in one of those being that she is sufficient arm candy (not always top priority but it is on the list). Right?

However in today’s world of independent women, the idea of arm candy isn’t a role limited to the ladies. Those of us that are (relatively) good looking, well mannered, and good at placing our napkins and cutlery have the opportunity to fill this role as her arm candy.

Naturally you’re questioning why would we consider this being the manly…don’t need nothing from anyone…alpha dog…player…HNIC…type of guys we are. Trust me homie it is more than worth it.

So here is a quick list on why I have no problem being her favorite accessory when given the opportunity:

+ It is always a good look to be invited to an event for the mere fact that she thinks you’ll look good next to her. Unlike our normal roles of chauffeur, body guard and provider, arm candy substitutes responsibility for 100% grade A benefits.

+ Speaking of benefits, free stuff is usually consumed. As we all know, the only thing better than stuff is free stuff especially when stuff includes food, liquor, travel and/or exclusive access.

+ These chances are far and few. Despite the large number of independent women out there, the opportunities to accompany them as man meat is similar to becoming the POTUS. It is possible but at the end of the day not all of us are Obama.

+ Admittedly going junior high on this one…but women do it all the time. Why not switch things up?  The only reason I can come up with is if she expects something in return and something means sexy time. You should never be expected to share that just because she gave you a free meal. That’ll teach ‘em.

There you have it gentleman, all the information needed on why we should step into the role of arm candy vs. always looking for it. If you still don’t believe it, just forward your portions to the UBF inbox.

In the meantime, share your best man meat stories UBF.

onetrik…mr. yes I am available that night…


About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

3 Responses to arm candy…

  1. Cleopatra James says:

    The difference is … the woman generally will settle for her ‘arm candy’; meaning she likes him enough for a relationship and rarely does it work out b/c most men don’t like feeling like the accessory… However, a man may or may not want something long term with his ‘arm candy’, but it’s usually HIS choice. On a sidenote, why is it when a woman is successful, she has to be called independent? And the one thing Miss Independent always seem to be lacking is a man, the ICING on her cake. Additionally, if she isn’t Miss ID she has to be her kid sister Miss Dependent, aka the ‘gold digger’… Can I get more character development for the woman?? These two extremes are killing me…

  2. Pingback: dear eva… « Us, Bottles, and Friends

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