who voted on this one…

you see…i was with it when we decided we wanted to get our hair all curled and greasy…and i was right there when we decided it was cool to spin on our backs on strategically placed pieces of cardboard…and i was all in favor when we took on rap as our primary form of communication…i even tagged along when we decided to start wearing our pants 2, 3, 6 sizes too big…i was cool with putting shiny shit on our cars…rode along when they started spinning…i got a little concerned when we decided that 1 out of every 6 of us needed spend some time in prison…but i’m pretty sure i’m not gonna be able to follow along with this one…actually i’m for damned certain i’m gonna have to sit this one out…it’s the latest craze sweeping through the african american male community…it’s life on the DL…aka part time gay…aka POKEr night…aka the “how can i most effectively spread aids through my community” contest…aka “no honey, my booty always looked like this”…

i had to draw the line somewhere and this is the perfect place to do so…first of all (let’s pretend there was no paragraph before this)…let me make one thing clear…i don’t have a problem with homosexuality…i don’t necessarily understand it, but if a man finds fun in another man’s hairy cavern…that’s between that man and that cave…it ain’t really my place to judge that…and if god thinks it’s wrong i’m sure he’ll think of a more direct route to express his disdain than some bumper sticker with a reference to adam and steve…but my thing is, if you’re gonna be gay…don’t be gay about it…be a man…and stand up for your ass affinity…don’t take your dookie dong back to your unsuspecting wife…as if some how her ‘love’ can wash away your attraction to other men…what you will actually do is drop off some pain and possibly a major life span reduction…

the thing that kills me, is that these cats will truly believe they’re not gay…but by definition, if you’re laying up with someone that has the same tools as you…you are indeed homosexual…don’t believe me?..look at the term homosexual…and trace it back to it’s latin roots…homo…derived from homorous means “i like’ …and sexual, derived from sezualle means “man booty big and small”…ok so maybe i made that up, but you’re still gay…so stop denying it…and stop starting these families with extra step-dads…and stop bringing aids into our community…basically, stop bullshitting…just gon ahead be gay…and let’s just go back to regular cheating and families on the side…and please let me know when the next black male fad meeting is so i can at least have a say in what we’re going to consider cool next…



About usbottlesandfriends
The tales of unpredictable truths from those guys your mom warned you about.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: